Effective Communication

To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.
Tony Robbins

Communication is hard work. What could go wrong if you share too much of your personal life? What could go right? As a writer and blogger I often share personal things I’m struggling with or have struggled with. Outside of my blog, I do my best to make sure I’m in an appropriate environment and decide what stories to share from there. Stories can shape the way we look at a person in good and bad ways. Tell a great story at the wrong moment and you could ruin someone’s day. Tell a decent story at a great time and you could lift someone’s spirit for days -heck maybe for a lifetime.

Lately, when it comes to communication, I’ve been trying my best to communicate and set healthy boundaries for myself. When it comes to communicating boundaries some people will have no understanding as to why you set those boundaries. Which is where the challenge comes in for me. I’m still figuring out how much to explain as to why I’ve created the habit of setting that boundary. What’s the best policy when setting boundaries? Should we explain why we set those boundaries or should we set our boundaries and leave it at that?

Any Suggestions?

A More Enjoyable Challenge

Life is not easy for any of us. But what of that? We must have perseverance and, above all, confidence in ourselves. We must believe we are gifted for something and that this thing must be attained.
Marie Curie

Confidence in ourselves. Yes, we hear this a lot. Especially growing up, right. Then we even learn different ways to mask our insecurities and fake our confidence. Then even get that reinforced with quotes like fake it till you make it. But we get it, have confidence. Yea yea yea. Let’s read the next line because I think that’s what we need to hear in order to truly have confidence in ourselves. I’m going to re word it and put in first person to really let it sink in.

I believe I was gifted for a purpose and I must find that purpose.

There’s the insight. Confidence comes with learning to accept and invest in your gifts. With the lessons that come with investing and accepting your gifts, naturally perseverance comes for the ride.

With all that being said, I think if we focus less on all those things, and focus more on learning to allow ourselves to have the things that bring us joy, we’ll find that things get easier as we go. If not easier, we at least give ourselves a more enjoyable challenge.

Poem Share

I stumbled upon this poem that warmed my heart and awoke my inner child. I had to share it.

The Land of Nod

BY ROBERT LOUIS STEVENSON

From breakfast on through all the day
At home among my friends I stay,
But every night I go abroad
Afar into the land of Nod.

All by myself I have to go,
With none to tell me what to do —
All alone beside the streams
And up the mountain-sides of dreams.

The strangest things are there for me,
Both things to eat and things to see,
And many frightening sights abroad
Till morning in the land of Nod.

Try as I like to find the way,
I never can get back by day,
Nor can remember plain and clear
The curious music that I hear.

Happenstance

Today I did my usual rest and cleaned than went on my merry way to finally have a creative date. My goal for the creative date was to find a planner and start filling it up. I went to BAM because they have both planners and books galore. Plus something warm to drink which always brings me joy. Unfortunately, I only found planners two with the formats I liked and didn’t want to spend my money on anything else. (To be honest though there was a Dr. Strange mug calling my name.) I was kinda bummed out but then I found some African mythology books I had been wanting to look into and sat down to read them. It was a good choice. It made my visit worth it and gave me a reason to return there in the future.

Overall, I’d say it was a successful creative date.

We make choices but are constantly foiled by happenstance.
Penelope Lively

A World In Us

Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.
Anais Nin

I got foodies with my friends and family and it was a blast. It was nice to talk about life and then feel every blanket and sniff every candle in Home Sense. While walking around and talking sh*t on the stinky candles, I kept thinking to myself how I wanted to do this more. I’m grateful for the friends I’ve had the pleasure of growing up with.

The Seeds

Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant.
Robert Louis Stevenson

This was a good reminder for me today. Before I had my little one, I’d garden every spring. I love watching the sprouts grow into full size blooms. I don’t garden so much anymore and next time I do, it will be some perennials and some nice foliage. I hope I plant the correct seeds the spring and will get to appreciate the low maintenance hardy garden I’ve visualized over the past two years..

Words of Affirmation

You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself, any direction you choose.
Dr. Seuss

Don’t forget how capable you are to unstick yourself! We don’t stay stuck. We know our value. We know what we bring to the table and we know we can walk away when we don’t like what’s being served because it’s not in line with our values. We speak our truth. We take care of ourselves even when it’s hard and uncomfortable. Because we’re valuable. Because we’re loved. Because we’re human.

There’s more in you than you’re giving yourself credit for.

Earthly State

Sickness is a sort of early old age; it teaches us a diffidence in our earthly state.
Alexander Pope

We aren’t invincible on this earth and the Good Lord has many reminders for us. Death, illness, the need to maintain ourselves regularly in order to function. We are human. We do need a reminder once in a while that we have limitations. At the same time, we need daily reminders about how far we’ve come and that our present moment is valuable. I love my life, I want to keep breathing, and I appreciate the amazing things (even with its limitations), that our bodies can do.

I find that leaning and swaying helps to keep us up right.

Novel Writing Life

Learning to enjoy the complete project, beginning middle and end, is what makes a creative’s life more bearable.
Saschia Johnson

Starting projects is fun and exciting. I love having projects outside of writing because for me, they get finished much quicker than writing books. Some people pump out books and they are great! Maybe someday I’ll be the type of writer that pumps out books too. But what I’m trying to appreciate is the relationship I have with novel writing. I want my novel writing to impact my life in a positive way. I’d like it to sneak into all the nooks and crannies hidden throughout my day.

There’s something about writing a full length novel that allows me to appreciate not only the nooks and crannies but also the lessons that life places before me. This is what helps me enjoy my time novel writing.

Reality to be Experienced

Life is not a problem to be solved, but a reality to be experienced.
Soren Kierkegaard

Some nights I have to go searching for the quote that fits just how I’m feeling and other days it’s only a few in. This one hit home though. Instead of trying to solve the problem, experience the details. ::insert explosion noises here::

It’s such a strange thing learning new cultures. You don’t really think about all the mini cultures all around you. Culture is different depending on what stores, friend groups, fan clubs, workshops, churches or whatever else you join into, And then on top of that it gets even smaller as you get to know each group. Stepping into a new culture isn’t about solving problems. It’s about learning to bring your whole self while accepting the selves of those around you.

Needed this!!