Weary Girl

It may seem I’m falling away

I probably am

My stomach aches

My mind hurts from my own roaming eyes

From shards slipped between each fold

I can promise you I really don’t want to

Fall away, that is

But this shift is making me uncomfortable

This unreliability scares me

Deep deep in my bones

And so I refocus on being the constant

In my own life

Which makes me busy

And sleepy

-Saschia

8 Ways To Fall Forward

1. Allow yourself to fall. Cry, scream, nap, do self care.

2. Get healthy. Healthy diet and exercise help with a healthy mind.

3. Talk it out. Find someone who is in a healthy place emotionally to talk it out.

4. Set goals to focus on for the next year. Not so focused they become a crutch just a means to move forward.

5. Surround yourself with communities that share your interests. 

6. Trust your gut. When something doesn’t feel right, trust that. Don’t let people take advantage of your vulnerable state. If they weren’t there through the struggle chances are they won’t be there through the healing.

7. Move forward. Stay away from environments that no longer serve you. Learn the signs and patterns of toxic behaviors and set boundaries immediately so you don’t end up in the same situations over and over again.

8. Learn to be ok alone. Become your own best friend. Learn yourself. Take up hobbies. Feed your brain.

 

 

The Art of Letting Go

She’s Dead

I’ve softened from the wheel of time

My heart, swollen from loss

From love

These tipped toes move through the crevice where my suicide mocks me

And life burns my loose ends

I have become the voice I died for

Her crown tossed to the floor

Neglected by my attention

What is the reason for this, but my empty stomach

Starving for more more more

Heart

-Saschia

Kiss Me

While the world wastes away on a monotonous routine

step outside of it all and kiss me hard.

Don’t kiss me hard only after everything is falling apart

Kiss me hardwhen everything is going right

There’s no point in waiting

This is what life is:

connections, honesty, bravery

Show up, kiss me.

It’s not always easy,

but it makes life worth living

And these days it seems we need more reasons

to stay alive.

-Sasch

Still Written

There are many times I give away my time to write. I give it and give it and give till I’m writing 10 words and starving for solitude. I know I should hang on tighter to my time to write. I should be more demanding but it’s such a slippery thing. It shifts and molds in countless ways. I grip, then I give my last five minutes and I’m left grasping at nothing. I slip away because writing isn’t something that can come or go. I, the writer am coming and going. Writing does not cry without me, I cry without it. I ache and spiral and shift when I’ve strayed too far, but it is always as I left it, blank, unfinished, or completed. But when I return I won’t be exactly the same as I was when I left.

-Saschia On Writing