I’m setting my foundation below the surface
Beneath the bulbs
Mingled with tree roots
Over 100 years old
I sit alone and pick and pick
I ride the drunkin boat
And flow in all directions
I wrap myself in gauze
And slip into the silence
I am here
I’m alive
And my home is rising
-Saschia
She wasn’t ugly
Not by far
Actually, she had a pretty face
A face you’d see in the mall
Maybe the girl across from you
buying panties and a bra
You know
the one you smile at and politely
say excuse me to
She looks like she could be
your favorite cashier
Or someone who got straight A’s
in highschool
She and I
We both felt that powerless sting
We both sat and wondered
What it is we did
to be left
Was it the sex
Was it something we said
Both forgotten
After so much effort
And of course
We should have known
I mean, we knew
We knew he wouldn’t stick around
And someday another woman
would come
Maybe the new girl will have
the same basic name as hers
Because it’s highly unlikely
to be the same as mine
in spelling at the least
But still
the powerlessness
It feels like bondage
And no
she and I
we do not compare
Maybe in another world
In another place
In another time
My face is no basic face
And my body meticulously sculpted
by babies
Some dead some alive
And so while we are connected
she and I
By the same
Powerlessness a man has brought to us
We are not one in the same
And I hope and pray
That I never make the same mistake
She did
Of falling for a married man
And acting on it
-Saschia
The weight of the world
Rests under the tips of my toes
It meets each step
As if it knows
Just where I need to go
-Sasch
My home leaned for so long
It leaned on the strongest tree
The closest tree
It just leaned
As if it was built that way
But a strange wind blew
The kind that’d kill a witch
And it stood my house straight
Now my house doesn’t lean
As if it were made that way
It stands straight
You know,
The way a house should
-Saschia
Ah, the opositonal pulls
The maneuvers
The crawls beneath the floorboards
fingertips that brush the sky
No matter how many times
They still keep coming
I twirl
I sway
I sleep
I play
I try my best to extend my web
In so many ways
And here on this winding road I’ll stay
I’ll stay
-Saschia
The trees fall away
I’m left with stars
and bodies merging
Clasped hands and
Throats stuffed with scrolls
We dance and drift into spirals
He searches my mouth
I search his heart
This is the life we choose
Separate but together
-Separate
He set me on fire then he kissed me
He leaned right in and kissed me
Right there in the flames
I still question whether it was him
I think back to it
I look for strings
I check the mirror
Then he let me go
He let me go like he should have when he met me
It stung to know I have less to offer him
but
You see, I’m no longer the type to be chained
Not to love, not to men, not to anything other than my dreams
And so yes, I cut my insides on his shards of glass
but he fingered my demons
As he watched the blood drip drip from between my thighs
-Sasch
I can place the pieces on the game board
And attempt to guess my opponents wishes
But, there’s always that chance
They could give up
Or surprise me
I’m not much into games
But like most others
I do prefer certainty
-Saschia
Here we are again
Bound to the same choices
An endless loop
Of learning to say no to the things
That don’t seem so bad
In the moment
But cross my
Clear set boundaries
My boundaries are not a challenge
Or a suggestion
They are the streetlights and guardrails
That keep me on the right path
To my desired destination
-Saschia
I’m not waiting for my blessings.
I’m collecting them
I Tack them to my wall
For future reference
Souls locked away
For my own enjoyment
You know,
Husbands fucking wives
Wives fucking husbands
Making babies cry
Making writers write
Making me rise
To another dimension
That’s some human shit
Tell me about it
-Sasch
