The steam around me is hardly noticed

my feelings

cooped in the shed

that came with our backyard

I take breaths

I feel the shower and take in that very moment

it feels so good to breathe

without a worry

My head rests against the wall

and I think of how hard it is to think

how hard it is to not be automatic

 

I swallow basic thoughts

crunch on mere survival

The fog fills the bathroom

and blurs the mirror

I cannot see me

but I can see the fog

 

❤ Saschia

 

Home Alone

Today has been my first day home alone in an empty house. Alone. The only sounds I hear are the washer and the air purifier. It’s musical. When my husband first left with the kiddos I felt like a kid in the candy store. I was rushing around trying to figure out what I wanted to do first. I had to rip myself away from the cleaning I do when everyone is home so I could actually enjoy my time alone. I decided to turn on the Keurig so that the water would be heated by the time I’m done taking my shower. I am a woman who requires a lot of freedom, but on the other hand, I will so loosely pass that up for my children. I just know, one day, they’re going to be gone living their own lives and I am passionate about investing in my children’s future.

I had to make sure I wrote this down so that I can always come back and appreciate this moment.