Notes from the Experiment

“I want to write the book that breaks rules just enough to let something holy slip through.” -Jayne.Press

I know what I wanted when I started this novel. I wanted an experimental fiction novel that not only allows me to express myself. I wanted it to get under people’s skin (just a little bit). But when it gets under their skin, I don’t want to be there. Annnd, since I’ve realized that I don’t really want to be there when people are annoyed by my experimenting, I kind of backed off a little bit. For now, at least. It just seems a bit irresponsible to get everyone all flustered and then not want to show up for it.

Now I’m debating how far I want to go. I don’t want people to throw the book down out of frustration. I want them to be frustrated (a little bit) with my audacity and keep reading because they need to know what happens. And I want to feed my readers’ minds and souls. I want us all, me included, to reach the end of my novel and feel like, yes, this is exactly what I wanted.

And that’s all.

No big deal.

Just took years of tinkering.

And then there’s quotes like this…

“Art is not about pleasing. It’s about provoking, expanding, and sometimes, confusing.”
— Tilda Swinton

And I think to myself fuck it, Sasch, go all the way and don’t apologize.

I’ve always wanted this. My entire life. To be a writer in the throes of it all and here I am.