Giving Too Much Away?

The worst thing: to give yourself away in exchange for not enough love.

Joyce Carol Oates

I like this quote. I’ve been sitting thinking about how many times I gave myself away because I didn’t speak up. I’m thinking about how many times I gave myself away because I said yes when I wanted to say no. But I also think about the times I gave myself away by saying no out of fear and anxiety.

But after thinking about all that I came to a conclusion. Let me start here.

Lately, I’ve been reminding myself that I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be at exactly the right time. I tell myself that I trust the process and timing for my life. That thought shifts my mindset and leads me to the idea that it’s much better to give all the love I need to myself instead of putting pressure on others to love me enough. Just writing this releases my worries about whether I’ve given away too much of myself to others. It allows me to take responsibility and power for my own peace, joy, and love.

I love this quote and how it provoked me to reflect on how much of me I’m giving away.

Self love it up, with healthy priorities, boundaries, goals,

Commitments to Myself

Sunday reflections

We carry too much guilt about letting others down- and too little fear of letting ourselves own.
We don’t fullu control whether we live up to others’ expectations. We do decide whether we meet our own.
The most important commitments to uphold are the ones you make to yourself.

Adam Grant

Today I have been reminded (several times in several ways) to keep my commitments with myself. The artist date is one writing responsibility I’m most inconsistent with, but it’s also one of the most inspirational ones. I feel so much better after I take myself out. I looked at all the journals and pens at BAM and I bought some books from a local used book store. I thought about how I choose to pick up a book. I read the description and then the first page to decide which book to get. I do start with the title and the author’s name. (It’s funny because, “what’s in a name.”) On my artist dates, I get to look at things as long as I want; without interruption, without any other goals or responsibilities. Being a parent for 14 years really takes these moments away from ya. Then add a husband in the mix, and browsing is out the winder.

Back to the point, keeping commitments with myself. I want to trust myself. I want to be that person for myself that I would be for any one of my other friends (or strangers even). I want to care about my concerns. I want to care about mind and my body and my soul. If taking myself to a bookstore or craft store once a week brings me joy and gives me the motivation to chase all my dreams, why wouldn’t I do that? (I can tell you why I wouldn’t. But this isn’t the place for it right now. I’m trying to make a point.) Artist dates are important for me as a creative writer, mom, wife and human being. I want to do better. I want to be more consistent when giving to myself.

SO

There’s 9 weeks left in 2022 I challenge myself to 9 more artist dates to finish out the year strong! Count down has begun. Anyone wanna join me?!

The Worthwhile Writer’s Life

Love doesn’t make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.

Franklin P. Jones

I don’t write about love much. I prefer to focus on action words that fall under love, but I like this one. It reminds me of writing. Writing doesn’t make my world go round but it sure makes for a hell of a ride! Without writing I’d still be living and I’d still be trying daily to live my best life but there’d be record of my life lessons for my future self. Writing has been one of my most valuable investments.

The Mind Alone

It’s not the place nor the condition but the mind alone that can make anyone happy or miserable.

Roger L’ Estrange

There was a time when my grief was so big and consuming that I had a hard time bringing myself to a positive mindful place. I think it’s healthy to grieve and important to welcome and respect yourself through the stages of grief. I say that because It’s not always about being happy. I write about positivity a lot. But learning how to allow myself to be sad and depressed was a big part of my journey. It’s silly to shame ourselves for our true feelings. If you’re sad, it’s ok. If you’re tired and depressed, it’s ok. It’s no one’s job to understand why. And it’s no one’s job to change your feelings. Those are yours. On the flip side, it’s always nice when we feel understood and when we feel that our voice is heard.

Great quote great thoughts came from it.

Walking on Sunshine

It’s time for you to come into your own. Don’t hold back. You are the energy that creates worlds.

Abraham Hicks

I’ve had a great week. I’m walking on sunshine right now taking in all these positive vibes. I’m riding this wave as long as it’s willing to carry me. Here I am, in a good place, inviting good things, sharing good things, welcoming good people, trying my best to be a good people. I could do this everyday for the rest of my life. I hope for a million more great weeks just like this one.

Opposing Emotions

To be human and to be adult means constantly to be in the grip of opposing emotions, to have daily to reconcile apparently conflicting tensions. I want this, but need that. I cherish this, but I adore its opposite too.

Stephen Fry

This is one of the first things I had fun with as a writer. I’m sitting here finally allowing myself to feel all the internal pushing and pulling. I acknowledge it regularly but it’s usually in and out of my head quickly or I’m just trying my best to refocus on my goals. After reading this, my perspective shifted from needing to control my thoughts, to accepting that all of them are a part of being human. Abraham Hicks always speaks on letting go of resistance and not pinching off the good that’s trying to come. So when I read this quote and reflected on some of my recent thoughts I felt some tension release. I felt more at ease.

What does this quote make you think about? Did it bring you any ease? Let me know in the comments.

Challenge

I love you not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you. I love you not only for what you have made of yourself, but for what you are making of me. I love you for the part of me that you bring out.

Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Everyone brings out a different part of us. Some people make us shine, others might try to take our shine away, unintentionally or not. I truly want to make sure I’m always learning new ways to let others shine. It might take some work getting people to believe how shiny they truly are, but I’m willing to take on the challenge.

Consistent Effort

Success is not final; failure is not fatal: It is the courage to continue that counts.

Winston S. Churchill

The courage to continue. I like that. There’s so many other projects I can start and finish but my two favs are, Writing and building a nonprofit. After I get those established, my next goal is the laundromat. It’s all gunna take time and require consistent effort. Consistent as in doing your best everyday not as in burning yourself to the point where you can no longer enjoy your own success. Steady, healthy, consistent effort.