Wake up with brand new expectations daily. Let go of whatever you didn’t finish the previous day and just focus on finishing today’s goals.
You may ask, well what if I get behind? Yes, that is a great question. I used to overwhelm myself when I didn’t complete my task list and it would snowball throughout the week until Friday came and I was ready to quit because I could never catch back up. My focus was on what I didn’t finish yesterday, rather than what I’m capable of in the present. Also, knowing that tomorrow is a fresh start and my work won’t snowball, means if I don’t push myself a bit harder to finish it, it’s not getting done. Which will put me past my deadline. It’s effective.
When I began to start everyday as a new day, the snowball effect disappeared, and I was still getting my work done in a mindful manor. Start everyday as a new day and don’t allow the unfinished work snowball into an anxious mess.
What you have to share is irreplaceable. People can write things similar to you and that’s ok. You’re adding your work to the mosaic. Maybe your piece is a little darker, or more positive, or more factual. We need it all. No matter what, your writing is unique to you because your life experiences, personality traits, and the place you were raised separates you from others. Own it, accept it, and keep writing.
You never know who you’ll inspire when you put your writing out there. As a shy person, I know there’s a lot of shy people who fear speaking up to support your writing, but they are still moved by it. Write for them. Write for you. I know when I first started blogging, I was really shy. I didn’t even want bloggers to know I was reading their blog. Now, I always try to make sure to let writers know I’ve read and appreciate their contribution. I’ve changed from reading blogs over the years. Your posts change people.
If, for the briefest moment you rescue someone from a dark place, your work has filled its purpose. This world has only a handful of moments that are pure beauty buried in the midst of a whole lot of bullshit. It doesn’t matter how you look at it. Dead is dead, gone is gone, and sometimes we are so lonely we can’t get out of bed. We need your work to get out of bed. We need your work to take one more breath. We need your work to remind us that there are times when everything is not ok and even then, we can still bask in a moment of bliss.
Now’s a great time to start valuing your voice as a writer.
“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved.”
— Helen Keller
Believe it or not success looks different for everyone. Some might think of success as fame, or as having a big house with a nice car, while others prefer to serve the community and live modestly. These are all great “big picture” ideas and they absolutely deserve to be on your vision board, but this is just the best place to start. You know what you want perfect now what other things do you need?
Your how? At what cost? What will keep you going?
How will you get your house and car?
This is vital. You might say, “Well, Sasch, obviously I’m going to get a job.” And yes, that seems obvious, but there are people out here that gain these things without working a day in their life. So let’s talk about it. How are you going to gain this level of success? Is it from a lover, building your own business, stock, invention, working in a field you love, working regardless if you love your job or not? There’s a million different way to get there. So really sit down and think about what actions you are going to take to become that successful.
At what cost?
At what cost are you willing to gain this level of success? It’s important, very important to flesh out what you’re not willing to lose in order to gain your ideal level of success. If you’re willing to lose it all, you might just do that. But if you prefer to have people, places, or things you’re not willing to give up to have your dream house, note those things. This helps to set boundaries. It helps to respect yourself and your values. For me, I’m not willing to lose my loved ones for my success. I want them here with me through all of my successful days.
What will keep you going?
Ok so now you’re there, you’re successful. You look around and appreciate what you worked hard for? Now what? You can’t just stop. You have to maintain at this point, so…
I used to be offended when people misunderstood my work, then I came to realize that the evolution of thought is what art is all about. Not that it’s about being misunderstood but it’s about setting the idea free and allowing it to be whatever it becomes. It’s not always easy to allow your work to be its own thing separate from you as the creator.
The principles of true art is not to portray, but to evoke. — Jerzy Kosinski
When we set out to create something, we must trust that when it’s time, a message will be revealed. We must also be understanding that it won’t be in the same way that we, as the artist, received it, because the artist didn’t have her own art yet to give herself that message. So as the art is sent out into the world, it’s going to give its message in a different way than the artist received it.
The true use of art is, first, to cultivate the artist’s own spiritual nature.— George Inness
What’s great about being an artist is that our art not only evolves and changes when we set it free but we also evolve and change every time we set our work free. The process of creating changes us in million different ways. The way we see our own struggles gaze at us, the way we fill gaps and solve problems, and the way we attempt to give our ideas digestible context. These few things requ
A lot of us writers have our schedules with Time to Write scribbled in on the weekends (or whenever). And hey, that’s great. Setting time aside to write daily is one of the most important disciplines as a writer, but after some time, it’s important to start being less general. Define exactly what you’re doing when it’s time to write.
There’s a lot more to being a writer than just creating content. We have a boat load of things we are developing as writers. If you want better time management it’s important to flesh out what you plan to do with your writing time. Plus, if you give yourself a small list of specific goals it gifts you by returning a feeling of accomplishment. Check. Check. Check.
Here’s a list of ways you can think about how to be more specific with your writing time.
For a WIP- Focus on things you’re developing like plot, characters, their thoughts and motives, background story, details world building
There’s different areas of the story you can focus on while your writing or editing. Monday can be world building, Wednesday can be character building and so on. This helps so that you can improve on the smaller details of your larger work.
Networking isn’t something that needs to be done daily. 3x a week for 1-3 hours is enough. Anything more takes away from precious time to build content.
I think it’s important to continue learning different ways to think about your writing. Writing has so many different perspectives that we could read everyday for a lifetime and still have more to learn.
There’s four more specific goals to start with. Let’s think about how they can be broken down even more. With WIP, you can focus on different characters on different days. For Networking you can focus on one specific platform or different target groups on different days. So break them down into each moving part. Doing this will help keep things in perspective. We don’t need the world to know how much we’re doing, but we truly are doing a lot. This will help you have a visual about how much effort you’re already putting in. Believe me, I get it. It feels, sometimes like we’re not doing enough, but trust me, if you’re pumping out content and maintaining an online presence on top of all your other life demands, you’re doing enough! Keep up the good work.
When writing a character, it’s the wounds that guide their decision making. Unless something divine intervenes, when the character is left to make their own decisions, that decision must be made with their old wounds in mind. Whether it makes them use courage and face something head on, or if it makes them a coward (in the most honest term) and avoid any confrontation. Or maybe it just makes them take a second longer to make an unbiased decision. Anyway, the past must be taken into account with decision making. It tells the reader if the character is learning, if the character is ending up to be quite the bore which hopefully places the spotlight on other more interesting characters, or more excitedly is it pushing the character in a negative way causing negative reactions or villainous behavior. dum dum dummmm….
In life, we’ve got to understand our wounds like our character’s wounds. We will make decisions based on our past traumas. It’s up for us to decide if we will allow those wounds to make us stronger or turn us into our own villains. Or if our avoidance behavior is going to remove us from our own story.
Don’t remove yourself from your own story. We need you in all your glory to show up.
As writers, it’s important to value the process, but it’s trusting in your writing that helps deliver it to world. When I find myself doubting my work, it brings me down. I get writers block. I can get overly frustrated while I’m creating, so then I can’t get it finished. That’s when creating isn’t fun for me anymore. So, we need to trust our writing because it helps us to be confident in what we’re creating. We need to write because it saves people. So here’s seven ways to trust your writing so the world can keep on survive.
“If you have a strong purpose in life, you don’t have to be pushed. Your passion will drive you there.”
― Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart
Know your purpose
Once you know why you’re writing, it makes it easier to stay committed to your work. It gives your work a rich touch that’s unique to you. Use your purpose, goals, and values as beacons to get you through the rough patches. There’s a million reasons to quit, but you only need one to keep going. Discipline is great. Motivation is great. Determination is great. But none of those things are going to push you through your doubts, your blocks, and whatever else the universe throws at you. Find your purpose and let it distract you from all the reasons you have to quit.
Always take time to acknowledge your efforts
If you’re a writer, your work begins before you put fingers to keyboard. Whatever writing you’re working on, remind yourself how far you’ve come to get to this point. Recognize your efforts so that you can feel confident about your current skill level. Then keep moving forward.
“Creativity gives hope that there can be a worthwhile idea.” -Edward de Bono
Understand that you’re contribution is valuable
What you have to share is irreplaceable. We are still discovering artists from centuries ago. You never know who you are inspiring by putting your writing out there. There’s a lot of shy people who fear speaking up to support your writing, but they still are moved by it. If for the briefest moment you rescue someone from a dark place, your work has fulfilled its purpose. This world has only a handful of moments that are pure beauty buried in the midst of a whole lot of bullshit. It doesn’t matter how you look at it. Dead is dead, gone is gone, and sometimes we are so lonely we can’t get out of bed. We need your work to get out of bed. We need your work to take one more breath. We need your work to remind us that there are times when everything is not ok and even then, we can still bask in a moment of bliss.
Start new everyday
Wake up with brand new expectations for the writing that needs to be done. Let go of whatever you didn’t finish the previous day and just focus on finishing your goals for that day. You may ask, well what if I get behind? Yes, that is a great question. I used to overwhelm myself when I didn’t complete my task list and it would snowball throughout the week until Friday came and I was ready quit because I could never catch back up. I’d find my self wrapped up with what I didn’t complete the day before. When I began to start everyday as a new day, the snowball effect disappeared, and I was still getting my work done in a mindful manor. Also, knowing that tomorrow is a fresh start and my work won’t snowball, means if I don’t push myself a bit harder to finish it, it’s not getting done. Which will put me past my deadline. It’s effective. Start everyday as a new day and don’t allow the unfinished work snowball into an anxious mess.
Don’t overthink it
A good chunk of the time, it’s important for me to just throw my work out there. If I edit a piece too much it can lose its initial meaning. It’s ok to allow your writing to evolve, but don’t ruminate on it to the point of not sharing. Which leads to my next point …
“Some people believe holding on and hanging in there are signs of great strength. However, there are times when it takes much more strength to know when to let go and then do it.”
― Ann Landers
This months intentions I’ve set for mothering are spending quality time with my oldest, creating and being aware of teachable moments with my youngest, but most importantly taking time to enjoy motherhood everyday.
Spending planned quality time with my oldest is one of the best things I started investing in. It allows me to step away from all my responsibilities and just listen to her stories. (And let me tell you, she’s got stories for days which is amazing since she never really talked as a kid.) I love hearing her stories. I want her to know she’s invested in in more ways than one, not just fed and housed, but really focused on and paid attention to. So I started putting one day a week aside for just us two to bond. She always seems a little brighter after we are done with a planned hang out. I say planned because I feel last minute hangout session don’t really serve the purpose. I have to mentally prepare myself to focus on our time together or else I bring my work with me. So when I set aside the time ahead it really makes a difference. It allows me to be fully present.
The other intention I have is being aware enough to take advantage of teaching moments for my youngest. These are my favoritest moments of motherhood. Seeing my babies learn something new, lights up my life. She’s happy. I’m happy. Sometimes we celebrate. Sometimes it’s a silent understanding. But it’s always a good feeling to see my babies grow. Especially because I can get so wrapped up in other things.
I get wrapped up. I get wrapped up in my kids meeting their milestones. I get wrapped up in getting them to where they need to be. I get wrapped up in chasing my own dreams. I mention all that because it’s normal and I know every mom can relate to it. I forget to take time to enjoy my life with them. So the last thing on my list is also one of the most import, to enjoy momming. I try to get on the ground with them, share funny moments with them, and do things to create joyful moments. I like to remind myself the good things about being a mom.
I never really thought of setting intentions for momming. I used to just make lists of things I wanted to get done around the house. They were never really things to build intentional relationships with my girls. I assumed it would just happen naturally. And yes, I do think in many ways relationships get built naturally, but I think this way gives our relationship more value. I do value my family very much. So they’ve been added to my monthly intentions and I hope they grow and evolve into deeper and even more meaningful relationships.
I mean we have a entire world to survive here might as well make the strongest connections I can with the people I love most.
“Without pain, without sacrifice, we would have nothing.” -Fight Club
Life is full of pain. I’m not here to sell you sunshine and roses. We are going to suffer.
We’ll face times when our entire body aches from head to toe. It might be hard to breathe. To do the things we’ve always done without much thought.
Then it hits us. We’re falling apart. We wasted so much time worrying about gaining aches and pains that we missed out on opportunities. We missed out on people and places and things.
But here’s the thing, if you’re reading this, it’s not too late gain new opportunities. It’s not too late to be honest. To go back to the things you loved and loved doing.
You embrace the pain.
You sit and feel every ounce of pain and you stare it in the face until you’re too tired to do it any more. Then you wake up and do it again. It’s not going to be easy but just keep going. It’s going to take time but it’s worth it. You’ll get through it, then all those monsters you tucked deep inside you, become your tools. They become your reminders of how far you’ve come and how you’re strong enough to keep going.
The more you show up to face your monsters, the more you can learn to use them as tools for your growth and advancement in life. The more that you use them as tools, the smaller they shrink. Eventually the fear of facing them becomes a memory and you have moved on to bigger and better things. The monsters are still there, but now they don’t hold you back from the things you love. Tamed monsters make way for you to love the things you love in a healthy wholesome way.
Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars. Kahlil Gibran
Being able to love those closest to you in a healthy and wholesome makes room for so many other opportunities.
I write for my family. When I first started writing a few years ago, I was an anxious mess. After writing and learning to accept the many different aspects of myself in order to build honest characters, it made it much easier for me to understand those around me. I can listen with more intention. I can see when there is a miscommunication or when someone needs to define their terms.
The world becomes a weird place when you take the time to understand what makes us human. Well, at first it does. After a while the weird stuff becomes normal and you forget it’s weird stuff until someone looks at you funny for talking about the weird stuff. So when I noticed these things, I wanted to make sure my daughters were handed the weird place too. I hope they find some guidance in their weird place from mine.
There’s a lot of great reasons to write for your family. These are just a couple of mine but they keep me going