A place where you can be human.
It has been a weird two years, and this past year has been the weirdest of them all. I appreciate the weirdness. At the same time, I wonder if it’s going to keep getting weirder or if it’s going to reach a weird climax and get not so weird again? But then again, maybe it’s always been weird, and we are all way more informed now?
What do you think? Always been weird, going to get weirder, or is it going to simmer down?
I am so excited to be at the end of my novel! AH! I’m going to read through it maybe two more times and then get ready to start sharing this work of art. I like to think of it more as a work of art than your typical novel. It’s weird, like me, but it’s rich in thought!
I am deeply inspired by it, and it got me through some tough times. I write to get the release, to feel the love, to learn, and to understand. This novel is for the wanderers and the misfits, the weirdos, the lovers, and the ones who just never thought like the rest. I am so ready for it!
I was not born or raised to be like everyone else. My quirks are what set me apart, at least that’s what I tell myself. I’m kind of awkward, kind of emo but love glitter and pink. I’m an annoying overachiever with healthy boundaries. Weird, I know. I’m a recovering workaholic who likes to sleep. I love connection, but I require more solitude (like hours, weeks, months) than I do connection. All these qualities come together to make some strange artistic writer (me) who adores all the odd things in our world that increase our well-being.
Sidenote: I’d love more weird artist friends who understand the solitude part. I also adore the friends I have!!
“I think ‘weird’ is an interesting way to say ‘unique.’ It has a strange connotation, but weird is good. If you embrace your weirdness, you’ll be on the way to becoming who you are.” -Ben Falcone
“Art enables us to find ourselves and lose ourselves at the same time.” -Thomas Merton
This quote is exactly what phase I’m in right now. Today was a good writing day for me. A lot less receptionist, a lot more artist. You know, I war against becoming that woman who is ruled by her home duties. I enjoy an organized living space, but I also adore my writing life. So there are time limits on both.
Do you have time limits for your craft?
“To be an artist, you don’t have to compose music or paint or be in the movies or write books. It’s just a way of living. It has to do with paying attention, remembering, filtering what you see and answering back, participating in life.” -Viggo Mortensen
I’m getting back to myself and focusing on wrapping up my novel. I’m doing my best to focus on the story and what I want to say. I know what I want my readers to feel. I know that I want a good story. I just want to polish it. Focus its power without forcing too much.
Well, the point of all that is that unmasking is in process. Unleashing all my inner weirdness one day at a time.
“The purpose of art is washing the dust of daily life off our souls.” -Pablo Picasso
The daily dust piles up when you don’t take time to wash it off. That’s why God took the 7th day to rest. The world will chew you up and spit you out with not one ounce of sympathy. It’s your job to wash off the daily dust before it causes so much buildup that it wreaks havoc on your health.
I, like Picasso, feel refreshed and renewed after art. What helps you wash away the daily life from your soul?
“Life is blooming inside.”
Our indoor plant or internal life is what keeps the air clean. One great way to nurture your internal life is staying in touch with your thinking which is also known as metacognition. It’s very important. It helps you better navigate all the ups and downs in life. It helps you stay present and helps you tap into your intuition.
How’s your indoor plants?
There is no passion to be found playing small – in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living.” -Nelson Mandela
I did it. I doubled up and spent a couple of years working a “normal” job. If there was any job I could ask for, it would have been this one. The point is, I loved it. I was doing good. I was making money for the family, and it wasn’t a pointless job. I served my community. I’m not perfect, but I’m disciplined and kind. Since I was more of an observer than anything, I gained so much hands-on experience. BUUUTTT there was something missing. That drive, that passion that fills me to overflowing to the point that I share my fire with the world. That. was. gone. My fire was dim; it was there, and sometimes it shined bright and lit the light of those around me. But here, in this place where dead artists find my living soul and set it alight. These days where I spend half the day serving my family and the other half feeding my soul. This. is. the. life. And I had to see that for myself with my own hardworking hands. But that’s not the purpose of this post. The purpose of this post is that even though you love it, fuck it, even if you adore it, if that’s not what you’re called to, it’s going to dim your flame. It’s going to take away from your power. In the Christian faith, they say the Good Lord can use anything for good. And I think that’s exactly what the Good Lord does when you choose something good but not something you’re called to. The experience was valuable, but what was it that I needed to see? or prove?
Let me hear it, what’s dimming your flame? And what can you do feed that fire?
I have decided I want us to have slow mornings. I want us to sit in the sun and enjoy a cup of joe. I want us to be able to take time to check in with ourselves and the Good Lord. And I want us to move toward productivity with a clear and confident minds that are ready to take on new challenges. I want us to have days of rest to spend with our family and with ourselves. But I also want us to work and be part of something bigger than us, too.
How do you like your mornings?
“Being a successful person is not necessarily defined by what you have achieved, but by what you have overcome.” — Fannie Flagg, The All-Girl Filling Station’s Last Reunion
What have you overcome? What do you appreciate about where you are?
I’m looking at life from fresh eyes lately. This has been the most beautiful fall I’ve seen in a long time. There’s something about this writing life that calls me to appreciate the present.
Jayne.press