Our yesterdays linger on the back of my tongue
He’s locked the door again
No one is allowed in but him
And his music and his revenge that sits between his back teeth
I say I don’t feel safe
And I’m sad and I’m scared
But those words fall to the wayside
And so yesterday returns
That stuck feeling
That threatening feeling
My tongue itches so I bite it
And I bite me
And I bite him
A marked beast ready for slaughter
Oh heavens above, am I lost in the wind?
You are anchored deep in the richness of the earth
Full of flavor
Some seeds fall to wayside
Others are taking root
To return hundredfold, sixty, thirty
She could climb right in the hot dish water
it’s been days since she’s relaxed in a bath
she soaks her hands just a second longer
a crawler wraps around her leg
brings her joy
brings her frustration
“just five more dishes”
the crawler lifts a pant leg
“ugh, I need to shave”
soaked hands finagle the pant leg back down
smells like lavender and lemon
tastes like salt and soap
and feels like waiting for a million tomorrows
You’re the words I want to hear and the voice I seek in the darkness.
You’re the first person I think to call when I have good news
And the one I run to with my bad thoughts
I can’t help it
Separate lives, shared thoughts
Working together to create something
With nothing but the visions in our minds
When you feel like you’re about to lose your shit
How do you calm yourself down
When you’re feeling like a million bucks
How do you show it
I want to know what do you do to feel sexy
To turn yourself on
And to shut your worries off
On a hot date with yourself where would you go
I really do want to know
How do you accept each little part of you
Let’s talk this out…
What do you need right now?
Sometimes in the moment you don’t know what you need. Sometimes it takes an entire conversation to figure it out. It’s going to take courage to talk it out. So not only is it important to find someone able to deliver, that someone should also be willing to sit through the conversation.
Either you’ll figure out what you need and get it which in turn helps you learn to give it
“Or [you’ll] realize the person you’re asking doesn’t have the capacity to deliver. Both are gifts.”
Good night WordPress world. Sleep well. (Unless you have to write, then you should be writing😉)
I choose emotionally unavailable men because I require a significant amount of solitude. But instead I should find an emotionally available man who also needs a significant amount of solitude. It looks so simple in writing.
Oh, how his flames leaped forward
to swallow the shadows
he could have melted me
but I am what he’s made of
a fallen star
a musical conundrum
the dust grips me
his natural state
a tornado of right now
a black hole of present
I didn’t want to escape it
All I wanted to find
was the why to this nothingness
It always matters
it’s always a big deal
hearts souls sex
those skipped heartbeats
hang em on the wall
as reminders of the times
you’ve once lived
1. Allow yourself to fall. Cry, scream, nap, do self care.
2. Get healthy. Healthy diet and exercise help with a healthy mind.
3. Talk it out. Find someone who is in a healthy place emotionally to talk it out.
4. Set goals to focus on for the next year. Not so focused they become a crutch just a means to move forward.
5. Surround yourself with communities that share your interests.
6. Trust your gut. When something doesn’t feel right, trust that. Don’t let people take advantage of your vulnerable state. If they weren’t there through the struggle chances are they won’t be there through the healing.
7. Move forward. Stay away from environments that no longer serve you. Learn the signs and patterns of toxic behaviors and set boundaries immediately so you don’t end up in the same situations over and over again.
8. Learn to be ok alone. Become your own best friend. Learn yourself. Take up hobbies. Feed your brain.
The Art of Letting Go